What’s your food language?
— February 27, 2023 —
As we sat down at brunch, my friend announced, “I’m starving!” She looked at the menu ravenously and ordered eggs, sausage, bacon, toast, a smoothie. She dove in as though she hadn’t eaten in days and rapidly devoured every bite, scouring the table for leftovers. She believed she was “starving” and ate with abandon to satiate her hunger. Starving actually means dying from hunger—she wasn’t starving.
What if she didn’t think she was starving and was just hungry or excited to enjoy brunch? She would have ordered and eaten differently. Language impacts how and what we eat all the time, and for the most part, we don’t even realize it. One way to take control over our eating habits is to consider our language around it. Here are some common words that we can shift to redirect our relationship with food.
Famished, ravenous, starving are words that connote extreme hunger, requiring excess food. Thinking and saying them inspires us to eat extra to fulfill the intense state. Simply stating that you’re hungry, triggers a different mindset and response that does not require as much food. Interestingly, there are not a lot of words in the English language that are synonyms for hungry or represent a lesser degree. Peckish is one, but it’s a British word and not commonly used. To change the intensity of hunger, you might try an adjective with the word hungry such as slightly, somewhat, or a little hungry. Another approach is to shift the focus from the food to the experience, by acknowledging your enthusiasm to spend time with friends or to be trying the restaurant.
Have to or should do: Often, we describe eating healthy foods as something we “have to” or “should do.” Just writing that makes me remember how I felt when I was told I had to clean my room, or that I should go apologize to my brother. Being told what to do makes most people want to do it even less. So don’t tell yourself you have to eat your vegetables. Come up with another way to approach them focusing on the benefits—how about acknowledging all the nutrients they provide or how lucky you are that you get to eat them?
Prohibited: The opposite happens when we can’t have something—don’t you want it more? Try not to describe food as restricted or forbidden. Instead, say you are refraining from eating simple carbs, cutting down on them, or taking a break. When it comes to things you are avoiding that you like, it’s a good idea to add the concept of a time frame, making the separation seem less ominous and easier to do. Some examples are “for now” or “this month.”
Strong negative language: When I taught grade school children to cook, we used to say, “Don’t yuck my yum!” Imagine a classroom full of kids about to dig into some freshly made chili and one says, “yuck!” It ruins it for everyone and, even if they liked it before, the moment of joy is destroyed. By thinking or saying we hate, despise, or can’t stand a certain food, we ruin it. Chances are you don’t really have that strong an opinion, so why not lessen the energy around it. How about words like “dislike,” “don’t care for,” “not my favorite.” When you think of a food in this light, you’re more likely to try it again and give it another chance. You may be surprised that you only thought you didn’t like it.
Bad or Unhealthy: Labeling foods bad or unhealthy makes them bad and unhealthy. It’s true some foods are healthier than others and I’m not suggesting you devour high- caloric, sugary, or processed foods and call them healthy. But just like the placebo effect when you take a pill that does nothing and you experience all the benefits, if you consume something you believe is bad, you may experience all the negative effects. When you do indulge in french fries, cookies, or cake, just enjoy it. Make the experience worthwhile without demonizing the food or beating yourself up over the treat. If you feel satisfied from the experience, you’ll be less likely to run back for more.
What are some other words that you use that are negatively impacting your pleasure of food? Pay attention to your language around food for the next week and listen to the people around you. When you recognize a statement that is negatively affecting your experience, try to replace it with one that’s positive. Once you start noticing your habits, you’ll be able to change them, and it will shift the way you eat and feel.